Drizzy Drake said it best…
Now that the most God forsaken year in recent memory has come to a close, things really should only get better from here on out. If that asshole Julius Caesar hadn’t burned down the great library of Alexandria in 48 BC – we’d be 3,000 years more developed into the future, and many of the world’s problems we are plagued with simply would not be a thing, and this all likely would have been avoided (butterfly effect). Father time has moved us all along into a new year and we would all be best served to hit the ground running towards our goals with a greater appreciation for life.
New year. Same ridiculousness (at least for the usual suspects). So for this post we are going to kick off the new year by addressing some pressing matters…NeymarPalooza2021…public figures investing in soccer clubs, the need to exercise caution of playing chips during the era of covid, and last but not least…you guessed it…we have to address Edinson Cavani (Britney Spears)….Again!
NEYMARPALOOZA
Alright so it goes without saying that Neymar (player that stunted legacy going to PSG ten years early) likes to party. The man is Brazilian, we know he loves a good night out with his friends and of course a good night in with his….sister (!?!), as he has conveniently been injured for the past five years at the exact time of her birthday so he could go back to Brazil to hang out with her (suspect).
It turns out that Neymar did not actually have a 150? 500? person party at Mangaratiba beach (tongue twister) west of Rio De Janeiro. Something tells me he was planning on FORSURE doing it, but felt the heat from people in his camp that said he shouldn’t do it because of covid and bailed last minute. So, as a result did what so many people do who switch up mentally at the last minute portray – act like they were doing the right thing all along and not what they were in reality now falsely accused of doing before it actually happened (confused yet? I am…)
Now given covid outbreaks and what not – yeah, this wasn’t a good idea for New Years 2021 as much as we all wanted to celebrate the end of this heinous year in style. I personally hope that all the covidness goes away (like everyone) and that Neymar can have this party next year and that I somehow manage to get on the guest list. Until then – we all can hope that even long after the era of social distancing is over, that Neymar will continue to socially distance from his sister (heh).
SOCCER INVESTMENT CRAZINESS
So…in the times of changing investments, crypto craziness, it is hard to know what to believe in..but one thing is true..the world of pop culture/public figures is starting to pay attention to soccer…HEAVY.
David Beckham (finally) launching Inter Miami and making them apart of the MLS (next step getting an MLS team in the champions league?!). Our friend (my friend anyway – he tossed me his wristband) Lebron James made an investment equating to a 2% stake in Liverpool in 2011 and netted 33 million dollars as a result of their recent form and conquests. The man has vision, it is undeniable, he makes plays (on and off the court…). In addition, Ryan Reynolds (huge tool) and Rob McElhenney (the It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia dude) took over Wrexham United (they play in the 5th tier of English football…maybe they should stick to acting).
Either way this has got me thinking – how can a commoner such as myself get in the game of soccer team investing? So as an ever diligent student of the internet I simply looked this up. Some you are able to, you just gotta go through the correct exchange (sounds like a pain). Some teams that we are able to invest in include Manchester United (fave), Juventus (overrated), Celtic (what?) amongst a few others. I got my eye on Roma as a team that could be making some hefty returns in the coming years given their recent good business (flipping the likes of Salah and Alisson for handsome profits to reinvest). So, thinking along the lines of public interest and recent form in years past, it could be time to consider adding some FCs to your investment portfolio.
CONTROL YOUR IMPULSE TO PLAY CHIPS
The recent height of covid insanity, fixtures getting rescheduled on the daily, and the likes of Project Restart 2 looking more and more likely, contrary to many of the advising youtube channels suggesting that you should all play certain chips for a certain gameweek such as the “Blank” Gameweek 18 that is upon us; I would HIGHLY advise waiting to play the chip until the final hour of said fixtures – because you really don’t know what is going to happen. The biggest concern is if you play a chip early in the week – and then all the matches are cancelled for that week, you are left in a debacle. It appears my theory is partially true, as some fixtures have been moved around (Tottenham now playing Fulham instead of Aston Villa). This is more a warning for the future weeks for when deciding to play chips or not.
And with that piece of sage advice, here is my Free Hit selection for Gameweek 18…
EDINSON CAVANI BAN
First he was the matador, a lethal finisher in front of the net, next he became the bailador, gracefully bounding about as a part of an ensemble in ballet routines, and now in his latest form…has he become…una racista!!!? SAY IT AINT SO (this isn’t even his final form)!!
Ok. Now I cannot count the amount of times I heard “what are you gonna do with that?” as the response to me sharing what I was studying in college (Anthropology) with girls I went out with. As a result I never got past the first date (it is possible I had other shortcomings). Well now they finally have an answer… talk about Edinson Cavani’s latest drama.
Now I would like everyone to familiarize themselves with a term that really should be better understood for the sake of people having compassion, understanding, and above all enabling us to be decent human beings in the world without borders that we have come to live. Ethnocentrism. To put it simply ethnocentrism equates to the manifestation of the ignorance of the culture in power to declare otherwise standard behavior of a less dominant culture as right or wrong in relation to how it stacks up to their worldview. A simple example is, calling natives in an uncharted land savage because they pray to a moon goddess or ancestors, and not the dominant culture’s deity.
The same concept is at play here. Edinson Cavani is being punished for thanking a friend on social media (“gracias negrito” were the words). Because it is commonplace in Latin culture for people to address others by physical characteristics as a nickname or term of endearment, Edinson Cavani has been fined 100,000 pounds and had to miss 3 matches for what would be the equivalent of an American person saying “thanks blondie” to a friend on social media. Harsh some may think? Discriminatory and ignorant the Uruguayan Players Union would say.
Sure – the argument of you are in our territory you need to adhere to our laws/behaviors make sense when doing your job, but this was on the internet…this is this man’s PERSONAL life. He is getting fined for being a typical Uruguayan speaking and interacting with people in his native language OUTSIDE of work. I feel like the investigation should have made its way to Cavani’s friend in question and gotten his take on if HE was in fact offended. Is there something wrong here? We could always ask Akon…
Akon literally released a Spanish music album titled “El Negreeto” in 2019. Actually you know what hold the phone, where in the actual fuck has this dude been? According to the source used by every college student to write their papers (wikipedia) this man has not released an album for over a decade (Freedom in 2008). But he is an ageless deity of music so it really doesn’t matter and he can do whatever he wants. The fact that his label allowed for this release – is anyone going to fine him (it’s his label so he could fine himself[too meta? Me thinks yes])? Is it art and therefore unfineable and just cancellable? It doesn’t look like either is going to take place given the 96% approval rating of the album on Google. Usually when people get mad at artists they throw them in the dog house for a while and hate on their album even if it is good if they’ve done something reprehensible around the time of its release (Chris Brown 2009).
I actually was pleasantly surprised by this album. Before listening I went in with very low expectations (why I don’t know I have always loved Akon and Spanish culture, maybe it was just too much of a good thing for both to be combined). The album offers breezy reggaeton anthems reminiscent of the “Don’t Matter” days as the businessman in Akon caters to the populous Spanish speaking world. The jury’s out on his accent but the dude is undeniably a renaissance man.
Anyways…this has been a fun way to kick off the new year, and I hope all of you are well on your way to fulfilling your resolutions, and lord knows we can only go up from 2020…happy 2021 people!!!
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